I would like my essay edited and rewritten. The criticism I got for my essay was to tailor my argument towards a TARGET AUDIENCE of 18-30 YEAR OLDS that are educated. Also I would like the second half of my essay to have the main argument of using renewable energy. Please find at least one source to cite for this argument. DO NOT CHANGE FIRST HALF/STORY PART. Please follow my instructions provided while also following the criticism received.
Here is the criticism received: The main thing for you to work on right now is structure and target audience. Right now the paper seems split down the middle. The first half is an argument for individuals to remember that they have the power to reduce climate change. The second half is an argument in favor of renewable energy. I think for the argument to really flow, you need one or the other to take center stage. Do you want this to be a paper arguing that, though it can seem hopeless, individuals can make a difference, and advocating for renewable energy is one of the things they can do to make a difference? Or is this a paper arguing in favor of renewable energy with an acknowledgement that dealing with this issue can sometimes feel hopeless? I think you need to decide which you want your main point to be and bulk that up while trimming the other one down. For example, if the main argument is in favor of renewable energy, what are some of the counter arguments against renewable energy that you need to address? And how can we promote renewable energy (laws, individual action, corporate action)?
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